Volume 08 Judge Crater defender of the Red Planet.

ALL TRUE TALES OF WAR

Volume 08 Judge Crater defender of the Red Planet.

Again it is my job to bring you information on yet another important historical subject we really do not know allot about. As a historian this kind of thing is common and what makes me strive to search the annals of time for answers to quench my thirst of historical knowledge.

Judge Crater arrived on Earth on the tale of Halley's Comet in 1865 at the end of the Civil War. The huge red meteor made a large crater in the soft New Jersey sand thus the locals called him Crater when he emerged from his space cocoon. He was very upset that he missed the Civil War because he was a born warrior and had come to Earth to help Abraham Lincoln free all the slaves. Unfortunately he did not know Halley's Comet was created by God with a tear he wept when Abraham Lincoln was assassinated (See Volume 23 Halley's Comet God weeps for our beloved fallen father Abraham Lincoln).

Crater mostly hung around doing odd jobs around town and provoking the Spanish to get into a War. At this time his life all changed as he got a notice to go to jury duty. Crater like all good Americans was over joyed to being picked despite the fact he was an unregistered illegal space alien with out a green card living in our country.

Crater raced to the courthouse to begin his civic duties. He waited in a room for hours with lots of other people, it was really boring and all the magazines were like 20 years old. When they called him forward the woman gasp at Crater and told him to leave at once. Enraged at this injustice Crater atomized the woman on the spot with his heat vision. He then stormed into the Court Room and walked right up to the Judge and ripped out his heart right through his chest. Holding the heart high above his head he looked at the mesmerized court house and in a triumphant howl he announced " I am now Judge Crater" he then took a large bite of the heart and threw the rest on the floor. History was made that day in that New Jersey court house.

Judge Crater went on for many many years judging people. Guilty for some Innocent for others, those that enraged him met swift death with his atomic death eye beams. These were good times for Judge Crater and his thirst for battle was gone with him being a Judge and all. This would be the a good end for Judge Crater but this is where his tale really takes off.

While walking down the street in the 1920's he felt a phi brain wave from Lord Zoloft the Galactic Ruler of all of Mars. He was to return at once as Mars again needed their best warrior. Getting back into his red meteor he shot back into space to his home. On the way back he hooked up with the Martian armada and was given command of a squadron of Omega Class space fighters. The battle was really cool with space fighters shooting lasers and blowing up. Judge crater totally rocked and was blowing up everyone all by himself. After a few hours Mars had won and Judge Crater was the man of the hour. As he was landing his space fighter he looked up and it truly was a miracle as he saw Halley's Commit and knew that he must free all the slaves on Mars, and he did.